The storm was building last week with a weather forecast of bleak,
touches of frustration, building to sever eruption on Sunday night.
Saturday was a good indication it was getting close with the
recommendation to family that they seek shelter. Take bread and water
and bunker down for when it hits, it's not going to be pretty. Hurricane
Hormones struck land around 7.30pm last night and the wave of
destruction was instantly felt by those in the vacinity.
So
what led to the impact? In the previous week, I had struggled with
client meetings, trip to specialist, naturopath, doctor plus the usual
school and home goodies. Throw in some extra concerns about health and
you have the perfect storm. Last night came the eruption of a week of
worry, frustration, angst and so much more. The tears poured after what
felt like another struggle and I retreated to my bedroom saying I can't
do this anymore. After a couple of minutes, I decided to head outside
into the dark for some quiet time alone. As I sat outside looking at
the moon, tear rolling down my cheeks, I asked God, "why?" I don't want
to be like this, I don't want to be wound up and stressed - I have
forgotten how to relax. The brain is always thinking of what I could,
should, would, can and won't do.
Within a few
minutes the moon disappeared and as I continued to sit there in the dark
looking at the sky, a shadow appeared where the moon was. It was the
outline of an angel. At the same time the song, "How can I keep from
singing your praise" enters my head. It is then that I realise that I
am not alone and that there is a peace to be found in amongst all this.
This shadow was there for about 5 minutes or so and then slowly faded.
Today,
is a new day. I must make changes within myself and find ways to relax
and switch off. I don't have to save the world or build a global
empire. I have to learn to let go, to say 'no' and let others find their
own way without taking on their problems. It won't be easy but it is
possible. So today, I am setting a new direction now that Hurricane
Hormones has disappated into light rain. With help, the Hurricane will
never reach the height that it did last night. With help, the
Hurricanes will come and go but never tip the boat over again. With
peace, the seas will remain calm and all will return to what they should
be within myself.
If you have a hurricane heading your
way, take a step back and make the changes you need to protect yourself
and those you love. Sometimes its not easy to make the changes that
are needed. I know for me, it is going to take effort and conscious
decisions to change my mindset and refocus but it can be done because I
am not the only one on the job. God is walking with me every step and I
just have to let go and stay in the calm waters.
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